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 "Yes, Mr. Mayor. Nobody has reached the ballpark yet. Traffic has been gridlocked for the past two hours all over Southern California. But at least the Highway Patrol choppers have located that Bucky Fox character in a Santa Monica traffic jam." |
BASEBALL 2005
Genius columnist wants
freeway series for L.A.
of TheColumnists.com
There went that idea.
After picking Maryland to win college basketball’s title, I hoped the Terps would bail me out by taking the National Invalid Tournament.
Then I could lead this off with something cute. Like: So the Terps didn’t reach the NCAA tourney. They played the tortoise role perfectly by patiently crossing the NIT finish line ahead of the pack.
Didn’t work. Maryland lost laughably in the NIT semifinals. So another joke of a prediction.
And here we are at the start of baseball season. Which calls for a clear forecast.
You know the drill: The Yankees will win this, the Red Sox that. Randy Johnson will take the Cy Young, Manny Ramirez MVP. Everyone else can take their bat and ball and go home.
I’m not playing that game. I want to have fun. Instead of predicting what teams will win and what players will excel, I’m picking trends I WANT to see.
Welcome to Double F: Fox
Favorites.
The World Series: All L.A. The Dodgers and Angels.
The first Freeway Series that speeds to a title. I’m in
Los Angeles, so what’s not to like? Well, I hate that the
Dodgers ditched Adrian Beltre and Steve Finley. Then again, the
home team has the pop to come out on top of the weak National
League. The new-name Dodgers will upset the big-name Angels in
seven games.
NL division champions: Dodgers, Brewers, Phillies. I’m tired of Milwaukee crying in its small-market beer. Stand up like a true Brew Crew. And I’m sick of Atlanta winning the East ad nauseam only to faint in the playoffs. Philly has the muscle and those hot red pinstripes to make the Braves wobble all season.
AL division champions: Angels, Tigers, Orioles. Surely, Pudge Rodriguez has enough steroids left in his limbs to carry Detroit. And Baltimore! Is there a cooler place to watch baseball than Camden Yards? No.
NL MVP: Jim Thome. He sure looked thinner when I saw him at first base for the Phillies in spring training. Wonder why. But he still bashes the ball.
AL MVP: Ichiro Suzuki. Saying his name, watching him play. Just love it. Nothing like him in baseball. The Seattle Mariners will make a run at the playoffs because of him.
NL Cy Young: Pedro Martinez. Down on his cocky vibe when he pitched for Boston. Up on him now that he’s with my Mets.
AL Cy Young: K-Rod. That’s Francisco Rodriguez,
promoted to closer for the Angels. Why? Strikeouts, lights out.
What about manager of the year? Rookie of the year? Party guy
of the year?
Enough. Play ball.
©2005 by Bucky Fox. The illustration is from IMSI's Master
Clips Collection, 1895 Francisco Blvd. E., San Rafael, CA, 94901-5506,
USA. This column first posted April 4, 2005.
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